Irving Thackerman Parking Lot Impresario (Short Story – Part III)
October 3, 2014
Embracing Your Inner Hell Spawn
October 31, 2014
I told myself I wouldn’t do another essay about the broken heel and recovery (just want it to be over with at this point), but a friend asked me to do one final essay and I was also asked to write an essay for the local newspaper about the accident. So here we are from a local’s perspective. This essay also made yesterday’s edition of the paper.
Word Count 765
Compound Fractures
For The Masses
Every able-bodied individual in Silverton should have to live through the rehabilitation of a broken bone. I know exactly what you’re saying to yourself. “That’s unbelievable, and once again we have another example of Swanson’s wing-nut eccentricity on display.” Yes, I do indeed enjoy deviating from the usual norm., but I make my proclamation with a clear, drug-free mind, and totally believe in what I just said. Does this make much sense and justify my proclamation? Sort of, but then again of course it doesn’t.
Way back on July 22ndI tumbled down a flight of stairs and avoided head injury at the bottom by slamming my right foot into the threshold. Sure enough that broke the heel and resulted in me having to undergo major foot surgery (more screws in my foot than the bionic man). A subsequent over-night hospital stay followed, and then a resulting 10-week rehabilitation. Besides forcing me to spend inordinate amounts of time trapped in my apartment and practicing a credible slug impersonation, the convalescence resulted in all sorts of philosophical assessment.
At first the usual “feeling sorry” for oneself. Why did this have to happen to me, life is so unfair, this sucks almost as bad as indefinite imprisonment in a North Korean bomb building camp, blah, blah, blah? Then once I learned to accept my fate, I started looking at things from a totally different perspective.
Sustaining a broken bone at the height of the summer here in Silverton is actually a very interesting experience. So what evidence do I have to back me up in the making of this proclamation? All sorts of mini-stories as it turns out.
The main one I can unequivocally say is that people in this community are extremely generous. Various family members and other folks kept bringing me more food than most soup kitchens have in there pantries, and somebody must’ve put the word out that I was lonely and bored. Pretty soon all sorts of people kept stopping in to wish me good luck and a speedy recovery. I do a lot of reading, but after awhile it seemed as if I wasn’t doing as much as I like since I kept getting interrupted at various times throughout the day.
I watch some television and like to tell people I view a fair amount of comedy for research purposes. In principle though, I refuse to even turn on the tube between the hours of 9:00 am and 5:00 pm. Considering TV during this time to be an intellectual wasteland. I did have time to occasionally test this theory during my recovery.
After I’d rehabilitated enough to begin tooling around outside on my knee scooter, folks kept asking me how the break happened. Since the actual accident story sounds somewhat lame, I’ve decided to modify things Silverton style. Two main options. 1. The break happened as the result of a bad landing while Para-gliding off Kendall Mt. one sunny afternoon. 2. The fracture occurred because of a minor rock-climbing fall while bagging one of the steeper peaks around here. Both explanations sound sufficiently legitimate for me to use. Too bad I don’t Para-glide or rock climb, but most folks don’t know that so “ignorance is bliss” in this case.
Over the past two and a half months Silverton has gone through an ongoing political soap opera. I’ve taken this situation in from a somewhat unique perspective. Sort of an indifferent approach, but then again sort of not either. Although I have taken a side on the issue and would rather not say what that is at this time, because of my being physically trapped at the hotel day in and day out I feel like an outsider. Not really participating in the process, but then again not really jumping into the fray either. Jumping into anything being the last physical act I can participate in at this time. Maybe that’s what more individuals need to do in order to give them a bit of perspective on a contentious issue?
Now that we’ve entered into the heart of the fall season around here, I’m anxious for this heel break rehabilitation be over with. Doc says I should be close to 100% physically by the time ski season rolls around (got to get my priorities in order). In a weird sort of way I’m glad this happened. If you’re going to live through the rehabilitation of a broken bone, being a resident of Silverton is a good thing. Take it from the voice of recent experience.
